brats on motorbikes

Best way to deal with a pack of local kids acting up and screaming racist abuse at you whilst driving past you at 120KM per hour on a farty motorbike?

Follow them until they stop at a set of lights or outside a noodle shop, smack the leader on the back of the head with an open palm as hard as you can and then watch the big fella transmogrify into a sobbing baby in less than three seconds.

Oh, and don't worry about repercussions from big bro or moustache daddy, they'll probably thank you for it.

Taxi to Haad Rin

These cost 50 THB per trip, not 100 THB, regardless of the time of the month.
Always ask how much before you get in the taxi, especially if it is one of those pirates who park up outside the corner of Soi Farang or outside Yellow Cafe.
If the price is not right, counter price and if this fails just walk away, don't bother arguing for more than 10 seconds. Often they will try to get your suitcase/rucksack on the roof of the sawng tao before telling you the price. Make sure they can't get their hands on your stuff until you've agreed.

Rude lady at Pier

To the fat sweating pig who sells tickets for the Lompraya ferry at the end of the pier, go fuck yourself you ignorant mound of uneducated street trash. Next time you scream in my face for asking for the proper price of a ticket you're going over the edge of the pier with my boot up your fat arse.

Drop in Bar/Club - Haad Rin Noi.

A reputation of violence toward foreigners, police protection and a couple of murders within 6 months. If you argue with the barmen over your very short change then you'll probably get stabbed in the face. And as usual nobody will see anything.

Full Moon Party Rape Alert

There has been a spate of rapes during the full moon parties these past few months. Usually, the victim is pissed up on buckets and then literally jumped on by a group of young Thai males in the early hours of the morning as she sleeps on the beach or balcony of her bungalow. There have been stories of amorous young males climbing into the bungalows of sleeping girls whome a few hours earlier they thought were a 'sure thing' (until the bucket(s) kicked in). Another favorate of the rapists is to offer the girl a lift home on his motorbike, then once she's on his bike, drive her off into the jungle to rape her, or worse, takes her to a house full of pissed Thai males for a bit of group activity.

Foreign women attending the full moon party either alone or in small groups, be VERY wary of over friendly Thai males who want to hang out and make friends with the foreigner girls. If you don't know these men/boys before the party, then stay well clear of them, no matter how cool you think you are or how 'uber traveller' you think it makes you look.

The local police will do nothing about it and reportedly try to get the victim to sign a statement saying she was drunk and out of control. Often the rapists are from the mainland and come over to the party looking for pissed foreign girls who they have been led to believe through popular media, are 'easy lays'. Often the rapists are local boys under the protection of their
big Mafia taxi driver' fathers.

Still don't believe the stories? Then you're a bloody fool.

Be warned.

Hey hey we're the Isrealies!

if you're the Israeli who was thrown out of a bar I was sat in last week in Haad Yao, it serves you right. In most countries, we have to buy a drink for each person, not share one between seven. And yes, I think you're a c**t, and no I won't report the bar in question. They were great and you acted like a spoilt tw*t

Sri Thanu Island Family Shop

Double charging classics.

Location: On the corner of the main Sri Thanu road opposite the entrance to Moon Beach Bungalows AND opposite the 7'11 in Sri Thanu.

Even though these family run business are stones throw from 7'11 they still overcharge foreigners by as much as 200% for everyday items such as soap, drinks and water.
They are also incredibly rude to tourists.

If your local shop is obviously double charging you, ask for a Thai price (they still make money on this), If they refuse, go to 7'11.

DO NOT SUPPORT DOUBLE CHARGING ON KOH PHANGAN!!! IT IS A FALSE ECONOMY FOR THE LOCAL BUSINESSES AND UPON THE ARRIVAL OF TESCO AND MACRO FOOD STORES, IT WILL BANKRUPT THEM.

EDUCATE THEM INTO THE FUTURE!